It's a wonderful Felipe
by Knotheadsrus
Summary: It's a wonderful life...Felipe's version


PLOT: "It's a wonderful life" Felipe's version.

Disclaimer: I do not profit from these stories, except for the excitement I get from the writing. I do not own the characters or any part of Zorro. They are owned by Zorro productions. This is strictly for my own enjoyment and hopefully yours, as well.

I am posting this without the help of a beta. As it is so close to the holidays, I didn't feel it appropriate to ask anyone to have to take the time to pre-read. It is a Christmas story and I wanted to get it posted before the holiday. Forgive me for any mistakes. I hope you will enjoy it.

Thank you, Amy, for continuing to encourage and inspire me. You are amazing.

Happy Holidays to all!

**It's a wonderful Felipe**

The holidays had always been a difficult time for Felipe. The older he got, the more he was torn between the love and gratitude that he felt for the de la Vegas, and the feelings of loss and longing that he had for the parents that he couldn't remember. He felt guilty. Each year, as the holidays approached, he became more and more withdrawn. He had always smiled and participated in holiday festivities, but his heart had never really been in it. He put on a brave face for the sake of his benefactors.

Diego was more concerned this year than any other. Felipe had been disappearing for long periods, during the past few months. He knew that his young charge was not the kind to get into trouble, but it worried him that the boy was spending so much time alone with his thoughts.

It was Christmas Eve, and Felipe's thoughts wandered as he helped Don Alejandro loading the hay into the loft of the barn. The elder de la Vega had thought it would be a good distraction for the boy.

"Just a few more bales, my boy, and we will stop for the day." Don Alejandro patted Felipe on the back. "We will want plenty of time to get ready for the party."

There was a big celebration taking place at the tavern. The King's emissary would be there to witness the grand opening of the Pueblo's new orphanage. The Alcalde and Father Benitez would be accepting donations and the tavern would be filled with people celebrating the grand opening and the holiday.

Felipe nodded, but the look on his face made it clear that he was not looking forward to the festivities. He helped secure another bale to the pulley and then climbed the ladder into the loft.

Don Alejandro pulled on the rope, lifting the heavy bale toward the rafters.

Felipe reached out and pulled the bale toward the loft opening. His stomach flickered with butterflies, as a sudden wave of dizziness washed over him. The rope slipped from his fingers, sending the cube of straw careening toward the barn floor. Unable to yell out a warning, Felipe watched in horror as the bale crashed into an open stall door. The splintering wood flew into the air, striking Don Alejandro in the forehead and knocking him to the ground.

Felipe flew down the steps of the ladder and rushed to the elder de la Vega's side. Blood flowed from a jagged laceration above the older man's eye. He was dazed and tried to stand, but fell back to the dirt. Felipe pulled the sash from his waist, quickly wadded it up into a ball, and placed it to the old man's head to control the bleeding. He pushed at the older man's shoulder to keep him from getting up.

"I'm sorry." Felipe signed over and over.

Don Alejandro shook the cobwebs from his head and looked into the horror struck face of the boy. "It's okay, Felipe." He took the wadded up sash from Felipe's hand and sat up. "I am okay. What happened?"

Felipe shook his head. He didn't know. "I'm sorry. He continued to sign. Tugging on Don Alejandro's sleeve, Felipe pointed to the hacienda. They needed to get the injured man inside. Diego would know what to do.

"Okay. Okay." Don Alejandro conceded. His head ached and he knew there was no use in arguing with the worried boy.

**ZZZ**

Don Alejandro allowed Felipe to lead him into the hacienda. He kept the sash to his head, but was fairly confident that the bleeding had already stopped. "Diego!" He called. "Diego!"

Diego came into the foyer. "Father!" He rushed to Don Alejandro's side. "What happened?"

Felipe was signing wildly.

"What? Felipe slow down, I don't understand." He took away the sash from Don Alejandro's head and ushered him into a nearby chair.

"For goodness sake, you two, I am not an invalid. It is just a bump. Stop fussing."

"How did this happen?"

Felipe started to sign. His stomach was doing flip flops, the guilt was unbearable, and he had to get out of the room. "I'm sorry." He signed as he bolted from the room.

"Felipe?" Diego was confused and worried.

"Go to him, Diego." Don Alejandro put a hand on Diego's arm. "I am fine."

Diego weighed the options. He hated to leave his father, but he knew that Felipe needed him.

"Go." Don Alejandro insisted. "He needs you." He nodded. "Really, Diego. I am fine."

Diego gave a nod of thanks and hurried after Felipe.

**ZZZ**

Inside the cave, Felipe brushed Toronado's silky black mane. His head was swimming and he had to steady himself against the beautiful horse. The butterflies in his stomach had grown into bats. He took a deep breath and tried to keep down the rising bile that was tickling his throat.

Diego entered the cave and watched the teen for a moment before speaking. "My father is going to be fine." He said quietly.

Felipe nodded but didn't turn around. He clung to the ebony mane for support.

"It is you that I am worried about." He moved closer. "Is there something you would like to talk about?"

Felipe shook his head.

Diego place his hand on Felipe's back. He was immediately struck by the heat that was emanating off the teen. "Felipe?" He took hold of Felipe's arm and turned the boy to face him.

Felipe's head swam with the sudden movement. Unable to hold back the bitter gastric contents any longer, he dropped to his knees, grabbed the empty bucket in the stall, and began retching uncontrollably. His body shook as he gripped the bucket.

Diego knelt beside the teen and put a steadying hand on his arm. He watched, helplessly, as one wave after another hit the boy. Long after his gastric contents were empty, Felipe continued to heave and choke; his muscles burned as he struggled and strained.

By the time that the spasms subsided, Felipe was exhausted. He slumped against the bucket. His nose and his eyes watered; his head and body ached.

Diego placed his hand on the teen's forehead. He could feel the heat rising from the boy's skin before his hand ever made contact. "You are burning up. We need to get you to bed." He helped Felipe to his feet.

The boy leaned heavily on his mentor. His eyes were glassy and unable to focus clearly. "I'm sorry." He signed. "I'm sorry."

Diego shook his head. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You are sick."

**ZZZ**

Don Alejandro stood in the library. Dressed in one of his best suits, he brushed the lint from his shoulders and straightened his jacket. The cut to his forehead had scabbed over. Diego had insisted that he go on to the tavern. Someone needed to represent the de la Vegas and Diego's place was at Felipe's side.

Diego wandered past the doorway on his way to Felipe's room. He was carrying a fresh pitcher of water and rags to try to bring down the boy's temperature.

"Diego?" Don Alejandro called. "How is he?"

Diego looked haggard and worn. He had the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows and his bangs fell in disarray onto his forehead. "I can't get his temperature to break." He shook his head and sighed. "He is burning up." He pushed a stray strand of hair from his eyes.

Don Alejandro placed a reassuring hand on Diego's arm. "I'll send word to the tavern that we won't be able to attend." He started to take off his jacket. "Your place is with Felipe." He smiled. "And mine is with you."

"Father, no." Diego protested. He knew how much his father had been looking forward to the festivities.

A knock on the door interrupted the discussion.

"Alcalde." Don Alejandro was surprised to see Ignacio de Soto at his door. "Please come in."

"Don Alejandro." The Alcalde stood inside the foyer and took off his gloves. He pulled at each finger, with an air of superiority. "I would like to discuss the presentation this evening. As you know, the King is sending a special emissary."

"I'm afraid that we won't be able to attend this evening, Alcalde." Don Alejandro interrupted. "You see, Felipe is quite ill."

"Felipe?" He looked up, shocked that the de la Vegas would even consider missing such an important event. "Isn't he the servant boy? The deaf mute that lives here?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Diego raged as he entered the room. He was in no mood for de Soto's condescention. "Should we not be concerned with the well-being of our servants?"

"Calm down, Diego. I am sure that the Alcalde didn't mean to imply…"

"Imply what? That we should just let the deaf-mute die!"

Felipe stumbled through the doorway, compelled to get out of bed by the delirium and the raised pitch of Diego's voice. The words _**our servants**_ and _**let the**__**deaf-mute die**_ rang in his ears and he looked to Diego for an explanation. Unable to stand any longer, he collapsed.

"Felipe!"

Diego rushed to his side.

"You certainly do have your hands full." The Alcalde rolled his eyes. His disdain for the de la Vegas, especially Diego, was evident. "I am sure that when you brought the boy home you never imagined that your life would be inundated with fevers and phlegm instead of senoritas and celebrations." He headed for the door. "I can see why you have been such a generous benefactor to the orphanage fund." He smiled at Don Alejandro. "I'm sure it would have been a blessing if there had been one around when you needed it." His smile turned into a sneer. "Diego may have been able to find a wife and have a family of his own. Of course, what senorita wants a ready-made family?"

"Get out!" Diego bellowed.

"It is time you were leaving!" Don Alejandro pushed the Alcalde through the door. "Give our apologies to the emissary, but a _family member_ is ill and our place is here." Don Alejandro stressed the words to make sure that his point was clear.

The Alcalde nodded. Looking over Don Alejandro's shoulder, he got his first real look at the ill boy. "Dr. Hernandez will return to the Pueblo the day after tomorrow." He watched as Diego nearly carried Felipe back to his room. His tone softened. "I'll have him look in on you."

Don Alejandro nodded and shut the door.

**ZZZ**

When Don Alejandro joined him in Felipe's room, Diego was sitting in the chair. He held his face in his hands; his elbows rested on his lap.

Felipe was tucked back in his bed. Restless, he tossed his head from side to side; his hands and fingers moved in response to the voices in his head.

"How is he?" Don Alejandro asked softly as he entered the room.

"I can't get his fever to break." Diego rubbed his tired eyes. "Why didn't I see that he was sick earlier?"

"You can't blame yourself." Don Alejandro squeezed his son's shoulder. "I was with him all afternoon and I didn't notice a thing."

Diego nodded. "He would never admit to being sick if he thought that he might let either of us down." He sighed, heavily. "Doesn't he know that he could never let us down? Doesn't he know how much he means to us?"

"He knows." Don Alejandro sighed as he looked at the restless boy in the bed. "In his heart, he knows. But the holidays are a difficult time for Felipe."

Diego nodded. "Sometimes I forget how much he has gone through. It is hard to remember a time that he wasn't a part of this family."

"What is he saying?" Don Alejandro watched the boy's wiggling fingers.

Diego shook his head. "He is hallucinating, I think. His signs aren't making any sense." He dipped the rag in the basin of cool water then continued dabbing at Felipe's forehead and crimson cheeks.

"I'll make some coffee." Don Alejandro offered. "I think it could be a long night."

**ZZZ**

Felipe teetered between hot and cold. He threw back the covers and pulled at his clothes as his temperature rose to new heights. The sweat ran from his pores. He convulsed against the mattress as his body tried to extinguish the fire at its core, only to have his temperature spike again.

Diego stood in the kitchen with his father. Felipe had quieted for a few moments and Don Alejandro had insisted that Diego take a break while the boy slept. Reluctantly, Diego had agreed. They stood in silence; neither wanted to address the elephant in the room—neither wanted to admit just how frightened they were.

Down the hall, Felipe's temperature had risen, again. His delirious mind was plagued by guilt as the Alcalde's words echoed in his ears. He couldn't be a burden any longer. After all that the de la Vegas had sacrificed for him, he couldn't hurt them any longer.

Felipe pulled on his sandals and slipped out of his window. Between the dizziness and the wind gusts from a newly developing winter storm, he had to fight to stay standing. Inside the barn, he bridled his Pinto. Forgoing the saddle, he rode bareback into the stormy night. He couldn't save his parents, but he would save the de la Vegas.

**ZZZ**

Diego finished his coffee, splashed some water on his face, and filled the basin with fresh water. He had been away from Felipe longer than he had wanted, but Don Alejandro had insisted. He was right, of course, Diego would be no use to the boy if he collapsed himself. When he got to the doorway of Felipe's room, he drew in a sharp breath at the sight of the boy's empty bed.

"Felipe?" He put the basin on the bedside table and frantically searched the room for some sign of the ill teen. "Felipe?" Diego raced around the hacienda, then to the fireplace. He hit the button, and sprinted down the passage to the secret cave. Felipe had always found the cave a place of comfort. "Felipe?" His voice was becoming more panicked as it echoed through the dark empty cave.

Toronado jerked his head and snorted at the sound of his master's call. He pawed at the ground and shook his ebony mane.

"Where can he be?" Diego whispered more to himself than the beautiful stallion. He quickly slipped back through the fireplace and called out to his father.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"He's gone." Diego ran through the hacienda,again, searching every nook and corner. Don Alejandro followed closely behind.

"Who?" He grabbed Diego by the arm, putting a halt to the search. "Who is gone?"

"Felipe!" Diego shouted. His eyes were wide and frightened. "I went back to his room. He is gone!" He ran a hand through his hair and tried to think. "He is so sick. Where could he have gone?"

"Where have you checked?"

"Here in the hacienda."

"You check the barn. I will check out in the gardens." Don Alejandro instructed.

Diego nodded, but stood frozen in fear.

"We will find him." Don Alejandro promised. "He couldn't have gone far."

**ZZ****Z**

With the wind gusts strengthening and a bone chilling rain pelting his skin, even Felipe's fevered mind knew that he had to get out of the storm. He took shelter in a nearby cave, just in time for another wave of nausea and dizziness to strike. His body tensed and relaxed, as each new spasm seized his muscles. There was nothing left in his stomach to bring up and he was left with a bitter burning in his mouth from the bile that had risen into his throat. Weak and tired, he crawled into a corner of the dark cave. He sat with his knees pulled up to his chin; he closed his eyes and rocked back and forth, desperately trying to calm his fears. He hated storms.

Images of the people that he loved flashed in his confused mind. He saw Diego, so angry and tired, as he yelled at the Alcalde. He saw the longing in his mentor's eyes when he looked at the woman that he loved. Could the Alcalde have been right? Would Diego have been able to find love…have a life…if he had not been strapped with the orphaned boy? He saw Don Alejandro, lying bleeding and dazed on the barn floor. And though the images of his childhood had always been hazy, he remembered the guilt that he had felt kneeling next to his mother's lifeless body.

_They will be better off without me. I hurt everyone I love_. He thought

"Do you really think that disappearing into the night, in the middle of a storm, will keep the de la Vegas safe?"

Startled by the statement, Felipe frantically searched the cave for the source. _Had they found him_? His pulse quickened as pushed backward into the cave wall.

"You are too sick to be out in this storm."

Felipe watched as a beautiful woman came closer. She was dressed in a flowing white gown and her skin almost glowed. The twinkle in her deep brown eyes and her smile lit up the darkness of the cave. He couldn't believe his eyes. What was the beautiful woman doing in a cave? What could she want with him? He rubbed his temples; his head throbbed.

"I'm an angel, Felipe." The beautiful woman whispered. "I'm here to help."

Felipe shook his head. How did she know his name? _An Angel? _He gave her a disbelieving look.

"Yes, Felipe…an angel." She smiled and knelt by his side.

Felipe thought for a moment. "_Am I dead_?"

"No." The beautiful woman chuckled. "You are not dead."

Felipe looked up, shocked. The beautiful woman seemed to be reading his mind.

She watched as Felipe's shoulders drooped and he sighed. "You seem disappointed."

Felipe shrugged.

"Do you honestly believe that the de la Vegas are going to notice you missing and just go on with their lives as if nothing has happened? Do you think that if you died they would be happy?"

Felipe thought for a moment then shook his head. A clap of thunder rattled the cave and Felipe jumped. Diego would surely come looking. He would be out in the storm. Once again, Felipe shuddered, he had put someone he loved in danger.

_No, it would have been better if I had never existed_. A tear rolled down his cheek.

The angel studied the teen and then stood. "Is that really how you feel?"

Felipe nodded. He was sure that the people that he loved would have been much better off if he had never been born.

"Well…" The angel looked to the heavens and smiled. "If that is really how you feel…you never existed. You were never born."

Felipe rolled his eyes. The woman might be beautiful, but she was clearly crazy.

"I'm not crazy, Felipe. I'm an angel."

Felipe put his hand to his forehead. If she wasn't crazy, then it must be his fever. But, his brow was cool to the touch and the nausea and dizziness were gone.

"You don't have a fever." The angel smiled. "You aren't sick." She pointed to his shirt. "You aren't wet; you aren't cold."

Felipe ran his hand across his shirt. It was no longer wet. He started to sign, but the angel took hold of his hands. "There's no need for that now." She looked into his dark brown eyes. They were so full of questions. "Just say what you are thinking." She encouraged.

Felipe shook his head. He didn't speak. _Who was this woman?_

"Trust me, Felipe." She brushed the bangs from his eyes.

"I can't." He gasped at the words that tumbled out of his mouth. His eyes filled with tears. He had spoken. "How?"

"I told you." The Angel stated. "You never existed."

Felipe gave her a questioning look.

"It is really quite simple. The Felipe who can't speak doesn't exist." She explained. "He can't be sick. He can't be wet." Her head bobbled, emphasizing each statement.

Felipe narrowed his eyes.

"You are being given the rare opportunity to see what the world would be like if you never existed. But, be warned. Reality is hardly ever what you imagine." She took his hand and helped him stand. She led him to the opening of the cave. "It is your choice, you know. You can go back to your life right now."

Felipe shook his head.

"The answers you look for lie outside of this cave. Follow me, and you make your choice. Step outside, and you accept all of the consequences that come with your decision. Agreed?" The angel stepped out of the cave and mounted a brilliant white stallion. She extended her hand.

Felipe hesitated. He still couldn't believe that any of it was real. He took a deep breath, dismissed the sudden foreboding that had arisen inside him, and stepped into the sunlight. What did he have to lose?

**ZZZ**

They rode in silence. Felipe felt almost hypnotized by the rhythm of the horse's stride and the scent of the beautiful woman's skin, as he leaned in against her. Her chocolate hair fell in waves around her shoulders and down her back, tickling Felipe's nose as it bounced to the horse's gait. He couldn't help but smile. There was just something so warm and inviting about the beautiful lady…something loving and familiar.

As they entered the pueblo, Felipe was struck by how dark and deserted the courtyard seemed. Too early for siesta, it should have been filled with people bustling about, selling their wares and going about the busy schedules of their lives. Instead, the streets were barren and only a few die hard vendors stood next to their carts.

The angel offered Felipe her hand and helped the awestruck boy dismount. Turning circles to survey his surroundings, Felipe didn't notice the approach of the uniformed guard until he was standing next to the white horse.

"Hola. Welcome to Los Angeles."

"Sgt. Mendoza!" Felipe smiled and turned to face the welcoming guard.

"Oh no… that is Private." Mendoza shook his head. He looked around to see if anyone could hear the exchange. "The Alcalde would have me hung if he thought I had been impersonating an officer. I am a simple soldier." He thought for a moment. "But how did you know my name was Mendoza? Have we met before? You don't look familiar." He turned his attention to the beautiful lady. "I would certainly remember someone as beautiful as you, senorita." Mendoza blushed and quickly dropped his gaze to the ground, as he nervously kicked the toe of his boot against the dirt.

"You are too kind." The angel smiled, sweetly. "We are simply here to connect with old friends. The boy's family knew the de la Vegas."

"Friends?" Mendoza looked into the angel's kind eyes. "Perhaps I can help?" He smiled and tried to straighten his dingy wrinkled uniform.

"I need to see the de la Vegas." Felipe announced. "Are they at the hacienda?"

"The hacienda? No." Mendoza shook his head; he scrunched his face as he tried to find the right answers.

"Then they are here in the pueblo?" Felipe looked around, searching for the de la Vega's horses. "Are they at the tavern?" He could not contain the excitement in his voice. He couldn't wait to 'talk' to Don Alejandro and Diego. They would be so happy to hear his new found voice.

"Don Diego is out of town." He watched the boy's enthusiasm fade. "He is due to be back later, though. He will certainly be at the tavern when he returns." The guard tried to ease Felipe's obvious disappointment. "Is he expecting you?" He asked cautiously. "Don Diego is not fond of visitors or surprises, for that matter." He said, sadly. "It might not be a good idea to bother him the first day he returns. Don Diego has quite a temper, and if he is tired from the trip…"

"What are you talking about?" Felipe jumped to his mentor's defense. Diego almost never lost his temper. He was the most calm, collected person that Felipe had ever met. He had always welcomed visitors to the hacienda, expected or not.

"I'm sorry." Mendoza hung his head. "It's just that since…" His voice faltered.

"It's okay." The angel interrupted and nodded her understanding.

"Don Alejandro? Where can I find him?" Felipe was feeling an urgency to find his benefactors.

"He is at the church, of course." Mendoza nodded. "With Father Benitez."

"I have to talk to him!" Felipe sprinted across the courtyard toward the church.

"Wait!" Mendoza called after the boy. "How long has it been?" He shook his head.

**ZZZ**

Inside the church, Felipe watched as a few parishioners sat in the pews, bowing their heads in prayer. He tried to calm his nerves and stifled the urge to yell for the elder de la Vega. The need to find the Don became more urgent.

"Can I help you, my son?" The portly priest put a reassuring hand on Felipe's shoulder.

"Father." Felipe let out a sigh of relief. He looked into the kind face of the priest. "I am so glad you are here." He smiled. "I was told that I could find Don Alejandro de la Vega here."

"I am sorry, my son, but Don Alejandro has not received visitors in quite some time." He reflected for a moment. "Except for his son, Diego, of course. And even his visits are becoming less frequent." He sighed. "Might I ask what business you have with Don Alejandro?"

"Please, Father, I have to see him. I need to talk to him."

The round priest looked the young teen up and down. He was about to deny the request, but something in Felipe's frantic eyes made him change his mind. He led the boy to a small room in the back of the rectory. A single lantern lit the interior. Beside the window, sat the man that Felipe had been searching for.

Felipe stopped in the doorway, unable to move any closer. The man in the chair seemed so much older and frailer than Felipe remembered. He stared for a moment and tried to blink back the tears that were forming in his eyes.

"Alejandro." The priest stood beside the older Don and placed a hand on his shoulder. "This young man has come to see you." He smiled at Felipe and motioned the boy to come closer.

Felipe complied. He knelt and took the older man's hand in his own. "Don Alejandro? It's me... it's Felipe!" He squeezed the man's hand, but there was no response. The old man just stared across the room, his dark eyes open but unseeing. "What's wrong with him?" The boy questioned the priest. "Why doesn't he answer?"

"I'm afraid that Senor de la Vega hasn't spoken in years."

"What? Why?" Felipe didn't understand. "What happened?"

"Bandits attacked the Alcalde's soldiers while they carried the payroll. Don Alejandro stopped to help one of the injured soldiers and was shot in the process." The priest looked down at his friend. "There was a great deal of infection and the doctor did all that he could." He watched as Felipe shook his head.

"No." Felipe continued to shake his head. "There was medicine that was taken with the payroll. It helped Don Alejandro recover."

The priest gave him a quizzical look. "Yes." He said, slowly, trying to figure out how the young man knew so much about past events, and yet, didn't know it all. "There was medicine that might have helped. But the robbers got away with the money and the medicine. Don Alejandro was strong, and hung on for weeks in that coma. It was a miracle that he lived. Unfortunately, when he came back to us, he was changed. He has not been able to speak or move on his own, since he awoke."

The angel's words rang in Felipe's head. _You accept all of the consequences that come with your decision._ He squeezed the old man's hand, once again. "This can't be right." He whispered, as a tear slipped from the corner of his eye. "I'm sorry." Felipe patted Don Alejandro's knee.

The silence went on for what felt like forever. The older Don stared into the corners of the room. Felipe rubbed the temples of his head; he tried to figure out what his next action should be. _This wasn't right. It couldn't be._

"Does Senorita Escalante still run the tavern?" Felipe finally asked. It would be a good place to wait for Diego's return. Diego would know what to do. Victoria had always been kind and generous. He would stay with her until this mess could be sorted out.

"Senora de la Vega?" The priest countered. "Your family has really been out of touch for some time, haven't they?"

"Senora de la Vega? They were married?" Felipe could barely get the words out. He was happy to hear of the marriage, but it meant that the Alcalde had been right. Without the young orphan getting in the way, Diego was able to have the life that he deserved, with the woman that he loved. Diego and Victoria were certainly better off without him.

"Does she still run the tavern?" Felipe asked again.

"My son, let's talk outside." The priest looked compassionately at the older man that sat motionless in the chair. His voice was calm and solemn. "It would be better if we spoke in private." He held his hand toward the door. "Please."

Felipe allowed himself to be escorted into the hall. "Is she at the tavern?" He could hear the panic in his own voice as he questioned the priest again. "I need to see her." The priest didn't answer and the boy's panic grew. He started to leave. If the priest wasn't going to help him, he would go to the tavern and find her himself.

The priest took hold of Felipe's arm and stopped his departure. "Senora de la Vega is here." He said in a soft voice.

"Where?" Felipe looked around. He didn't like the heavyhearted look on the priest's face.

"I'm afraid that Senora de la Vega lies, here, behind the church." The priest said sadly.

"No!" Felipe shook his head and pulled free of the priest's grasp, as the sudden realization of what the priest was trying to tell him became clear. "No!" He cried again, and sprinted through the church to the door. Outside, he rested his hands on his knees. His lungs ached as he sucked in great gulps of air. He tried to clear his head. He had to find her.

Walking through the tombstones, of the church's cemetery, Felipe saw the names of many of the people that he had once known.

"She is on your left." The priest directed.

Felipe stopped. He stared at the stone for a moment then dropped to his knees. The tears flowed from his dark eyes as he wiped the dirt and debris away from the stone that was inscribed with the beautiful tavern owner's name. "How?" Was all that he could manage. He wiped his red-rimmed eyes with the palm of his hands. "How?" His voice was loud and demanding.

She was on her way to Santa Paula to settle the mortgage on the tavern. Bandits attacked and she was killed during the robbery.

Felipe shook his head. _No…no...no… she had only sprained her ankle that day_. He remembered it clearly.

His fingers brushed the cold granite, while he sat in silent prayer. When he finally stood, he was numb, inside and out. Felipe's eyes stared without really seeing; his head hung low, and he headed out of the cemetery.

"Wait, my son!" The priest called after the forlorn boy.

Felipe didn't answer the priest. He simply shuffled across the courtyard toward the tavern. _What had he done_? _This was all so very wrong_. He knew that he had to do something, but he had no idea what that something was. He needed Diego. Diego would know what to do—Diego always knew.

**ZZZ**

Distracted by his thoughts and not watching where he was going, Felipe bounced off the chest of another man crossing the courtyard. "I'm sorry." Felipe apologized and staggered backward.

"Watch it boy!" The familiar voice growled.

Felipe looked up; his mouth hung open, as he peered into the sneering face of Luis Ramon.

"What are you looking at?"

Felipe continued to stare. Luis Ramon had fallen to his death at Devil's Fortress. The Alcalde was supposed to be Ignacio de Soto. His head started to spin.

"Get out of my way." The Alcalde pushed Felipe aside. "Mendoza!" He bellowed and the bumbling lancer rushed to his side.

"Si, Mi Alcalde!" Mendoza saluted.

"Private, do these boots look shined to you?" He shoved the pair of boots into the Mendoza's chest.

"Well, you see…" Mendoza started to explain, but was quickly cut off.

"You idiot." Ramon straightened his jacket. "How much further do you need to be demoted before you are capable of fulfilling your duties?"

"But Alcalde," Mendoza answered. "I am already at the lowest rank."

The Alcalde raised his eyebrows. "You are lucky I didn't have you hung when you gave those bandits the combination to my safe!"

"Si, Mi Alcalde." Mendoza nodded and hurried with the boots back to the barracks.

"What are you staring at?" The Alcalde snapped at Felipe.

"N...nothing." Felipe shook his head. "I'm sorry." He lowered his gaze and started toward the tavern.

Ramon wrinkled his forehead and shook his head. There was something familiar about the boy. He shrugged it off. "De la Vega!" He called out as something else caught his attention. "It is about time you returned. I need a word with you."

Felipe looked up to see the Alcalde hurrying toward the tavern.

"What is it now?"

_Diego_? Felipe felt a surge of relief. The comforting sound of his friend and mentor's voice echoed across the courtyard. He watched as the tall man tied his horse in front of the tavern. He couldn't believe his eyes. No longer dressed in the tailored suit of a caballero, Diego's clothes were wrinkled and dirty; his hair was greasy and uncombed. Felipe had never seen Diego in such a state, not even when he had returned from the longest of cattle drives. He had always kept himself in almost pristine order. His deep blue eyes were marred by dark circles; the beard that he sported was at least a couple of day's growth. He watched the brief exchange between the Alcalde and Diego "This is not a good time, Alcalde." Diego spoke through clenched teeth. Felipe could see the fire that burned behind his friend's blue eyes.

"Of course." Ramon could see a vein throb at Diego's temple. "You have had had a long ride." he smiled. "I am an understanding man." He tugged at the ruffles of his sleeve. "I am sure you will have your rent payment for the tavern on my desk by business tomorrow." His eyes twinkled as he watched the vein grow larger on Diego's head. "You would not want all of your dead wife's hard work be in vain."

Diego took a step forward, his hands clenched into fists, but Ramon quickly turned and retreated to the safety of his office across the courtyard. Diego watched and fumed, until the Alcalde disappeared behind his door.

"Diego!" Felipe rushed to his friend. "I am so glad you are home. I need your help." He started to ramble. "I didn't mean it. I promise. It wasn't supposed to be like this." Felipe shook his head as he thought about all that had happened.

"You've mistaken me for someone else." Diego brushed past the boy. "I can't help anyone."

"No wait! Please, Diego. I need your help." He pulled on the tall man's sleeve.

"Go back to where you came from, boy!" Diego pulled free from Felipe's grasp. "There is no help here." He stormed into the tavern with the confused boy following closely behind.

Felipe was shocked. Diego had never in his life refused to help someone in need.

Diego reached behind the bar, took a bottle and a glass from a shelf, and found his way to a table in corner of the room. He quickly downed a large glass of the dark wine and was pouring another when Felipe confronted him.

"Please." Felipe pleaded. "I don't know where else to turn."

Diego greedily emptied the glass. He wiped his mouth on his sleeve and shook his head. "I told you before, boy. I don't know you. I don't want to know you. There is nothing here for you."

Felipe started to pace. His thoughts and his words began to ramble. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I don't know how to go back."

Diego rolled his eyes as he stared at the bottom of his empty glass.

"You have to recognize me!" Felipe started to panic. "I need you! I want to come home!" Felipe knocked the glass from Diego's hand. "Look at me!" He demanded.

"Have you lost your mind?" Diego pushed the bench and table back as he stood to confront the boy.

"No." Felipe shook his head. "Maybe." The tears streamed down the contours of his cheeks. "I don't know." He conceded. "Please." His voice trembled. "You have to know me." His eyes pleaded with Diego for some sign of recognition. "It's me, Felipe." He began to sob. "I want to come home."

Diego's eyes grew wide. He grabbed the front of the boy's shirt, lifting him up on his toes. "Is this some kind of sick joke?" Diego shook the boy.

"No!" Felipe shook his head. "It is me. It is Felipe!"

"Who told you to say that?" Diego Demanded. He looked around the room to see who might have played such a cruel joke, but nobody stood out. Diego tossed Felipe to the ground. "Get out of here."

The boy landed on his stomach with a sickening thud. He struggled to catch his breath. Rolling over, he did the only thing he could think of to make Diego understand. "Please." He signed. "Help me. I want to come home."

Diego watched the boy's gestures with curiosity. Felipe thought for a moment that he saw a flash of recognition, but it disappeared as quickly as it came. "Get out , I said!" Diego snarled and turned his back on the boy.

Felipe got to his feet and put his hand on Diego's arm. "Look at me, please." His voice was so soft it was barely audible. "I want to come home."

Diego turned without warning and landed a stunning blow to the teen's chin. "Get out!"

Felipe fell to the ground. He rubbed his chin and tried to stop the dizziness and ringing in his ears. "Look at me! You know me!" Felipe screamed.

Diego grabbed the boy's shirt and lifted him back to his feet. "Get out!" His fury grew with Felipe's persistence and he tossed the helpless boy toward the door. "And don't come back!"

Felipe stumbled out of the tavern and was stopped from falling by Mendoza who took hold of his arm. His tears flowed freely.

"You need to be more careful." Mendoza cautioned.

Felipe pulled free. He looked around for the angel, but she was nowhere to be seen. He needed to find her; he needed to get away from the madness.

Mendoza watched as Felipe untied Diego's horse. "Don Diego, that was nice of you to let your friend borrow your horse." He said as he entered the tavern.

"What friend?" Diego growled at the lancer.

"The boy that came to visit you and Don Alejandro." Mendoza watched Diego push past him.

"You idiot." Diego stood in the doorway. "I didn't let him borrow it. He is stealing it. Do something!"

"What?" Mendoza rushed past Diego and almost tripped on his own boots. "Stop, thief!" He yelled. "Lancers!" The portly private called out to two uniformed guards that stood near the barracks. "Quickly, that boy is stealing Don Diego's horse!"

Felipe had quickly mounted and was headed out of the pueblo. He kicked the horse into a run. The sound of gun fire popped around him and he had to duck and weave to avoid being hit. He had no idea where he was going as he disappeared into the setting sun. He just knew that he had to get as far away from the pueblo as possible.

**ZZZ**

Felipe slowed his horse as he neared the de la Vega hacienda. The fence to the corral was down. The hacienda, itself, was dark and lifeless. Felipe dismounted and carefully walked up to the hacienda door. It hung slightly askew and Felipe's hand shook as he took hold of the knob. He hesitated. There was something terrifying and lonely that made him pause. He took a deep cleansing breath, turned the knob, and took a tentative step into the foyer.

He had to wait for his eyes to adjust to the darkness of the room. The setting sun cast shadows against the walls. The moth eaten curtains danced in the breeze that filtered in through the broken window. Felipe felt sick to his stomach. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. The pain in his head was intensifying. This had been his home. It had been a place of warmth and comfort. It had been the place that he had grown up, where he learned to trust and love. He felt the bile rising up in his throat. It was all gone. It was ruined.

Felipe leaned heavily on the fireplace; he pushed the button on the mantel and started down the long dark passage to the cave. His pace quickened with a sudden urgency; his heart pounded in his chest. Nothing could prepare him for the sickening site of the desolate cave. There was no laboratory, no experiments. There was no stall or ebony horse. There was only the jagged rock of the unused cave and the deafening silence it produced. Felipe fell to his knees. He didn't know how much more he could take. He couldn't breathe.

"What did you expect?" The soft voice of the angel echoed behind him.

"Not this." Felipe shook his head. "It is all wrong. This can't be real."

"I assure you it is very real." The beautiful angel knelt in front of him. "This is what you asked for. This is what the world would be like if you had never been born." She lifted his chin and wiped away a tear.

"I don't understand." He shook his head, unable to comprehend how his simple existence could have made such a difference.

"You were not there to overhear the bandits as they forced Sgt. Mendoza to give up the combination to the safe. You were not there to steal the saddlebags bag that contained the Alcalde's money. They got away and Sgt. Mendoza was demoted to Private. He spends most of his time working extra hours at the tavern in order to repay the lost money."

"But, Zorro…" Felipe started, but he knew the answer.

"You were not there to help Zorro out of the canyon when he fell." She thought for a moment. " In fact, you were not there to inspire Don Diego to even become Zorro." She smiled and looked around the cave. "This place remained just a cave and Diego just a simple caballero. He tried, of course, to do what he could against the Alcalde's tyranny, but without the anonymity of Zorro there was little he could do without bringing great retribution down on his family."

Felipe nodded. He knew Zorro's greatest power was that of being masked and unknown.

"Without Zorro, Luis Ramon was able to continue his reign of terror on the people of the pueblo. With no one to stop him, he was able to take possession of both the hacienda and the tavern."

Felipe flinched at the thought of Luis Ramon being in control of his home and the tavern.

"There was no Zorro to return the medicine to the doctor in order to help Don Alejandro. He survived, but suffered greatly from his extended time in the coma." She watched the boy's eyes fill up again as he fought to hold back the tears. "And, he was never there to rescue Victoria from the bandits. Instead of an injured ankle and a trip to Zorro's layer, Victoria lost her life."

The tears streamed down Felipe's face.

"Don Diego never recovered." The angel sighed. "He had lost his home, his father, his wife, and…" She paused. "… his son."

Felipe looked up, startled at the mention of Diego's son. He opened his mouth to speak, but the words stuck in his throat.

"Yes." The angel nodded sadly. "Victoria was with child when she was attacked. She gave birth to a boy, but her injuries and the trauma of the difficult birth were too much for either of them. They both perished that day…Victoria, and the son that they named…Felipe."

Felipe dropped his gaze to the ground. Suddenly, he understood Diego's violent reaction when he had mentioned his name.

"You have been shown what the world would be like, for the people that you love, if you had never entered their lives.

Felipe sat in silence. His mind reflecting on all that he had seen.

"But not all of your questions were answered."

He looked into the angel's kind eyes.

"Ask the question, Felipe." She smiled encouragingly. "You have come too far not to know all that is destined."

His mouth felt dry and his throat burned. He had to swallow a few times before enough sound would come out to form the words. "My parents." He choked.

"You want to know if your parents survived?"

Felipe nodded. It had always been his greatest fear that his parents had died because they had tried to protect him.

"Your parents loved each other long before you were ever a thought." She gave a small giggle. "They lived in the same house where you grew up. Your father worked the small farm and your mother tended her home."

"They were happy."

"Very happy." The angel agreed. She watched the boy's face fall. "And just as when you were little, your father knew that the farm was no longer a safe place. He and your mother packed as much as they could and left their home in the hopes of starting a family somewhere safe."

Felipe furrowed his brow.

"The battle raged all around them. Your father tried to take the safest route, but it was no use."

"What? What are you saying? They died?" He shook his head. "That can't be! That doesn't make sense." He argued. "Nothing changed!" He could feel the color rising in his cheeks as he filled with anger. "That means that my life didn't mean anything to them." He stood to face the angel. "My existence didn't change things for the two people that it should have affected the most."

"Of course it changed things." The angel corrected.

"But you said…" Felipe started to argue, but the angel quickly interrupted.

"I said that the outcome of their death didn't change." She held her hand up to silence the boy's protests. "Your parents died on that battlefield." She put a hand on his shoulder. "It wasn't their death that your existence affected…it was their lives."

Felipe looked into the angel's dark eyes, mirror images of his own and tried to understand.

"Your mother and father loved being parents more than life itself. They loved you." She caressed his face with her soft fingers and held his chin in her palm. "Without you in their lives, they were denied the greatest joy that two people in love can imagine. The joy of having a child. The Joy of watching that child laugh and learn and grow. Without you in their lives they were denied the chance of being parents and of knowing a child's love." She kissed the top of his forehead. "Oh yes, my child. Your life meant everything to them."

He was overcome with guilt, torn by the thought of his parents' sacrifice and love and the overwhelming emotion he felt for the de la Vegas and his life at the hacienda.

"You don't need to feel guilty." The angel said, as if reading his mind. "Your parents would be happy that you found love and happiness with the de la Vegas." She pushed the bangs back from his eyes. "It is what your parents would have wanted. It is what every parent wants, for their child to grow up happy and healthy and loved. There is no betrayal to your mother and father for loving Don Diego and his father. "

Felipe closed his eyes and images of the de la Vegas flashed before them.

"You must know, after all that you have seen, how very much you have been loved by them."

Felipe nodded.

"Each life is a gift—a gift that we share with those around us. It is a gift that comes with great responsibility. It isn't something that should be thrown away or taken lightly."

Felipe melted to the floor. He buried his face in his hands and sobbed, deep heaving gasps. When he looked again, the beautiful angel was gone. "Wait!" He cried out. "It can't end like this. I am sorry." He sobbed. "I want to go home!"

**ZZZ**

Felipe didn't know how long he had waited for the angel's return…minutes, maybe days, it was hard to tell. When he finally found the strength, he got to his feet and made his way back down the long passage to the hacienda. The walk seemed longer than usual as he shuffled his feet. His sandals scraped the dirt and he had to steady himself by putting his hand on the cold stone walls to keep from falling.

Inside the library, he let out another remorseful sigh. He looked around the room at the dirty walls and cobweb laden ceilings and tried to stifle another round of tears. If he didn't exist, what was he still doing there? What more could the angel possible want to show him? The only thing that he knew was that he wanted to be home. Not there in that dirty reminder of what he gave up, but home, where Diego and Don Alejandro were happy and healthy.

The sound of thundering hooves broke into his thoughts. Felipe peered out the window and saw a posse of lancers riding up to the hacienda.

"He came this way." He heard one of the lancers announce. "That is Don Diego's horse out front." They dismounted quickly. "Let's check out the inside. He couldn't have gotten far."

Unable to reach the hidden passage in time, Felipe hurried to the room that he had once called his own. He carefully opened the window and crept out. When he was sure that the lancers were well within the hacienda, Felipe grabbed the reins of Diego's horse and galloped into the night. He rode like he was being chased by the devil himself and didn't stop until he was safe in the cave where the angel had first appeared.

Felipe huddled in the corner. His ribs ached from the heaving breaths that he took between sobs. He wrapped his arms around his knees and pulled them up to his chest. He rocked back and forth. _I didn't mean it. I was wrong. I want to go home. I am sorry. _ His thoughts raced.

**ZZZ**

"Felipe?"

The boy looked up to see Diego rushing toward him. He had not heard him enter the cave. Instinctively, he scooted backward and crossed his wrists in front of his face, ready to deflect another blow from the man that he had angered by stealing his horse.

"Felipe it's me." Diego gently took hold of the boy's wrists and lowered them. "It's Diego." He spoke slowly and tried to reassure. "You are safe now."

Felipe tried to speak, but the words wouldn't come. He started to panic, unable to understand what was happening.

"It's okay." Diego soothed. "You are safe."

"Diego?"

Felipe heard Don Alejandro's voice boom from the cave's entrance. He shook his head. _What was happening_?

"We've found him." Diego called back to his father. He never took his eyes off of the trembling teen. "He's okay, but we need to get him home and out of these wet clothes."

"I'll get the wagon." Don Alejandro smiled at the sight of his son and Felipe together again.

Felipe's hands shook as he fingered his damp shirt. He shivered uncontrollably. He was wet. He smiled. He was wet.

Diego reached out to put a hand on Felipe's forehead and the boy flinched. He was still trying to decipher what was real and what was not.

"It's okay." He reached out again and this time the boy didn't pull away from his touch. "You are still very warm." Diego frowned, but Felipe looked almost relieved at the thought of having a fever.

He started to shiver and Diego took off his jacket, placing it around the boy's shoulders.

"Are you ready to go home?" Diego rubbed the boy's arms and tried to stop the shaking.

Flooded with emotion, Felipe flung himself against Diego's chest and sobbed. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He signed over and over.

"Felipe?"

Felipe's knuckles turned white by the death grip he had put on Diego's arm.

"It's okay." Diego was startled by the intensity of the boy's embrace. He wrapped his arms, protectively, around Felipe's shoulders and rocked.

"Diego?" Don Alejandro joined them. He could see the concern in his son's eyes as he rocked the frightened teen.

Diego looked at his father and shook his head. He didn't know what to say.

"Let's get him home." Don Alejandro helped Diego to his feet.

The frightened boy continued to cling to his mentor.

Just as when he was a small child, Diego placed his arm under the teen's knees and swept him into his arms. "I've got you." Diego whispered. "I've got you."

Don Alejandro, who had always reprimanded Diego for treating Felipe like a child, gave a nod of approval, and Diego carried Felipe out of the cave.

**ZZZ**

With both Felipe and Diego settled into the back of the wagon, Don Alejandro drove back to the hacienda as fast as was possible. Tied to the back, Felipe's pony and Diego's mare trotted merrily behind.

Felipe clung tighter to Diego with every bump and jiggle of the wagon. "I'm sorry." He continued to sign despite Diego's reassurance that he had nothing to be sorry for.

"It was the fever. You will be home soon, safe and sound, with the people that love you."

Felipe nodded. His head rested against Diego's chest. _Home. _The word echoed through his head as the hypnotizing motion of the wagon and the sound of Diego's heart in his ear lulled him to sleep.

**ZZZ**

"We're home."

Felipe felt a soft squeeze to his shoulder. His eyes fluttered open.

"We're home." Diego said again. His blue eyes shone brightly in the light of the moon, filled with the love that he had for the boy. He assisted Felipe to his feet. He watched as the teen stared at the hacienda. He looked as if he was seeing it for the very first time.

Felipe looked around and gave a sigh of relief. No longer weathered or abandoned, the hacienda looked warm and inviting, just as he remembered. The broken down version of his escapade was gone.

"Come now." Don Alejandro stood beside the wagon. "Let's get you inside."

Felipe took the Don's hand and accepted his help getting down from the wagon. Overwhelmed by the strength that he felt in the elder de la Vega's hand and relieved that the frail listless Alejandro was gone, Felipe threw his arms around the older man and squeezed.

Not one for open displays of affection, Don Alejandro was at a loss. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around the teen, returning the hug. His eyes questioned Diego, who had just gotten down from the wagon, but his son merely shrugged. "Come now." He ordered, softly, and took the boy by the shoulders. "There are some worried people inside that need to know that we have found you."

"Worried people?" Felipe questioned.

Diego nodded, put his arm around Felipe's shoulder, and ushered him through the hacienda door.

**ZZZ**

Barely inside, they were surrounded. Maria, the de la Vega cook, hurried over with a warm cup of chocolate. Felipe took the warm mug. His hands trembled, nearly spilling the sweet liquid. Diego helped him steady the cup as he took a careful sip. He could feel the warmth of the liquid travel down his throat to his stomach. It felt good.

"Madre de Dios, Felipe." Sgt. Mendoza approached. "You look terrible."

He was met with a disapproving glance from Diego.

"What I mean is…we've been searching for hours." The Sgt. Stuttered. "It must have been frightful out there on your own." He removed the blanket that he had wrapped around his shoulders and placed it around Felipe's.

Diego nodded his thanks.

Felipe's face showed his confusion and Diego explained. "As soon as he heard you were missing, Sgt. Mendoza rallied some troops and joined us in the search." Diego gave Mendoza a grateful slap on his back.

"That is just what friends do." Mendoza blushed. "I am just glad that Felipe is home."

"Thank you, my friend." Diego's eyes moistened.

"And you." Victoria joined them. She gave Felipe a harsh look. "You gave us quite a scare." Her scowl quickly turned to a smile. "You must promise never to do that again."

Felipe nodded. His eyes watered; he looked around the room at all of the people who had come to his rescue.

Victoria brushed the bangs from his face and placed a kiss to his forehead. She looked to Diego who read her thoughts immediately. Felipe was warm.

"Let's get you out of these wet clothes and into bed." Diego squeezed Felipe's shoulder. "We don't need that temperature getting any higher." He turned to his guests. "Victoria, I am having the guest room prepared for you. Sergeant, you will take my room for the night." Before either cold protest he added. "Please, accept." He almost begged. "What better way to celebrate the holiday and Felipe's safe return, than to share it with the people that mean the most to us?" Diego smiled as his friends nodded their acceptance.

"Come, Sergeant." Victoria placed her hand on Mendoza's arm as they watched Diego escort Felipe to his room. "There are some warm empanadas in the kitchen."

"Si, Senorita." He nodded and followed. "But Don Diego did not have to give up his room for me. I am a simple soldier. I have slept on many floors."

"It's okay, Sergeant." Victoria glanced over her shoulder and watched Diego and Felipe disappear. "I don't think he would be spending much time in his bed anyway."

Sgt. Mendoza smiled and nodded.

**ZZZ**

Felipe changed out of his damp clothes and sank into the warmth and comfort of his bed. He had not realized just how tired he had become until that very moment. He could barely keep his eyes open.

Diego sat on the edge of the bed and placed a hand on the boy's forehead. Satisfied that the fever was starting to lesson, he smiled. "How do you feel?"

"I'm okay." Felipe signed. "You?" He returned the question.

"You are home and safe. That is all that matters." Diego tried to smile, but his eyes betrayed his words.

"What is it?" Felipe insisted and sat up in the bed. "What is wrong?"

Diego thought for a moment before speaking. When he did, his voice was so soft that Felipe had to watch his lips to be sure that he understood what was being said.

"I thought that I had lost you, tonight." Diego choked. "I turned my back, and you were gone." He hung his head and Felipe had to shift in the bed in order to see his lips. "It was like you simply fell off the face of the earth." He paused and Felipe watched his mentor, who had never been at a loss for words, struggle with what he wanted to say. "As Zorro, I have tracked a hundred bandits. But when it mattered most, I could not find one sick boy in a storm." He looked to Felipe, his eyes begged for forgiveness. "You could have died."

"It wasn't your fault." Felipe was adamant. He thought of telling Diego about the angel, but he knew that he would never find the right signs to make Diego understand what he, himself, barely understood.

"I just don't think that I could survive if anything had happened to you." Diego shook his head. "I can't even imagine what my life would be like without you in it."

Felipe didn't have to imagine. He shuddered.

"Felipe?" Diego saw the shudder and immediately placed a hand on the boy's forehead, afraid that his temperature was rising.

"I am fine." Felipe smiled. "YOU found me. YOU saved me." He squeezed Diego's hand. "I am home!" For the first time, ever, there was no guilt associated with the statement. He was home, where he belonged.

"That's right, Felipe." Diego pulled the boy into his arms. "You are home." He raised his eyes to the heavens. "Thank you for bringing him back to me." He whispered and squeezed Felipe harder.

**ZZZ**

Diego dozed in the bedside chair, one hand maintained contact with the sleeping boy, at all times. Felipe had tried, unsuccessfully, to convince Diego that it was unnecessary to remain in the chair all night. He promised that he would not sneak out again, but Diego remained steadfast. He needed the contact and Felipe didn't really mind. It was comforting.

"He certainly does love you."

Felipe heard the soft sweet voice of the angel and opened his eyes.

She stood by his bedside; the glow that surrounded her lit the room. Felipe looked over to Diego, but he remained asleep in the chair, as if under a spell. He was oblivious to the beautiful woman, undisturbed by her presence or the sound of her voice.

"So, you have given up the nonsense that everyone would be better off without you?"

Felipe stared at Diego and nodded.

"Good." The angel smiled. She watched as a deep thought clouded Felipe's chocolate eyes. "What is it?" She tilted her head.

Felipe sat up in the bed. He stared into the beautiful face of the angel. She could see the question as it formed in his mind.

"Ask the question." She insisted, for the second time, in as many days.

"Are you her?" His hands trembled as he looked into the Angel's dark eyes—eyes that, so closely, mirrored his own.

"Your mother?"

Felipe nodded.

From the very first time that the angel had appeared, he had felt something. There was a calming familiarity in her voice. A tear formed in the corner of his eye. He had no real memory of his parents. He had been too young and too traumatized when they had died.

The angel brushed back the hair from his face. Her eyes glistened behind her long dark lashes. When she spoke, her voice was soft and soothing. She knew how much he wanted a memory, any connection to the past and his parents. She understood the guilt he felt for moving on with his life.

"Would it really make a difference?

Felipe couldn't believe that she could even ask the question. _Of course it would make a difference! Being his mother would matter!_

"Your mother is a memory." She took a deep breath. "But a memory can't hold you when you are scared. A memory can't search for you in a storm, or nurse you back to health when you are sick." She looked at Diego and smiled. "A memory can't rescue a small frightened child, and teach him how to live and love again." She turned back to Felipe and placed a kiss on his forehead. "The parent, that you long for, sleeps uncomfortably in a chair at your bedside. He would give up his own life to keep you safe and his greatest joy is watching you grow and be happy."

Felipe watched Diego shift in the chair.

"Trust your heart, it knows the truth. When you are ready, all questions that you have will be answered."

Felipe wiped a tear from his eye.

Diego shifted, again. He awoke with a start. Felipe had broken the contact that Diego had established. "Felipe?" Diego's heart raced.

Felipe grabbed Diego's hand. "I'm still here." He signed.

"Are you alright?" Diego questioned, unsure why Felipe was not asleep in his bed.

Felipe smiled. He was home with his family. He would never stop missing the parents that he had lost, or longing for memories of his past, but the guilt that he had carried for so long had vanished, as easily as the angel.

**ZZZ**

**Epilogue**

The hacienda was a flurry of activity by the time that Diego and Felipe emerged from the bedroom. Everyone knew that the duo had needed not only their sleep, but the time together, undisturbed. It was already mid-afternoon and the enticing smells that wafted from the kitchen made Felipe realize just how hungry he had become.

"Merry Christmas, Diego." Victoria greeted her friend with a smile. "And you." She turned her attention to Felipe. "How do you feel?" She kissed his forehead and gave a sigh of relief. The fever was gone.

Felipe blushed and brushed his toe of his sandal against the floor. "I'm okay." He smiled as he signed.

"Good." Victoria chuckled at the boy's bashful nature. She linked her arm in Diego's and ushered him into the dining room. Felipe followed closely behind.

"Ah, Diego." Don Alejandro came into the room and patted his son on the back. "Good, you are both up."

Sgt. Mendoza came in from the kitchen. "Maria has certainly outdone herself." He could hardly contain his excitement. "Thank you for having me." He smiled.

"We are happy to have you, Jaime." Don Alejandro squeezed the Sergeant's shoulder and Mendoza blushed at the intimacy of the use of his given name.

"We certainly are." Diego agreed. "We have a lot to be thankful for this Christmas." He wrapped his arm around Felipe's shoulder; his eyes moistened and his voice cracked as he spoke. "What better way to celebrate than with the people who mean the most."

"Si, Don Diego." Mendoza agreed.

**ZZZ**

Maria really had outdone herself. They feasted on fine olives and figs and the largest turkey in the territory. A bakery of breads filled baskets and desserts of every kind lined side tables, waiting for full stomachs to empty.

They laughed and told stories of Christmases past and when everyone had eaten their fill, the small group moved into the parlor. Diego played the piano while his guests and his father joined their voices in song.

Felipe stood in front of the elegant Christmas tree admiring the decorations. Among the many finely carved ornaments that the de la Vegas had collected, were the hand-made ones that Felipe had fashioned throughout the years. They had kept each and every one and proudly displayed them on the magnificent tree.

A beautifully carved dove caught Felipe's attention as it hung from one of the branches. He was drawn to the bird and gingerly pulled it from the branch, letting it rest in the palm of his hand. He didn't remember seeing it during previous years, but there was something familiar and comforting about the finely carved bird. He took hold of the red silk ribbon and began to hang the ornament back in its place, when a vision flashed before his eyes. The images were hazy as the scene played out in his mind.

He saw a young family as they sat before a Christmas tree of their own. The man tossed a small boy in the air, catching him firmly in his strong arms. The child squealed with delight. The woman watched and clapped, her dark brown hair fell like swirls of chocolate around her shoulders and she giggled at the sight of her two favorite men. The child wriggled in his father's arms, his tiny fingers reached for the woman, and the object that she dangled from a red satin ribbon. It was the beautiful dove ornament.

Felipe could feel his heart racing as the vision continued.

The child snatched the carved bird from his mother's grasp and exploded with triumphant laughter.

Felipe could almost feel their touch on his own ribs, as he watched the young couple take turns tickling the child.

The young family stood before their small tree. The father lifted the boy, still clutching the carved bird in the palm of his hand, and watched the child place the ribbon around one of the branches. The bird swayed as it dangled from the tree and the couple clapped and cheered at the boy's accomplishment.

Felipe closed his eyes, desperate to stop the fading images from disappearing. He felt his knees weaken and he sank to the floor.

Diego was by Felipe's side in an instant and placed a steadying hand on his back. "Felipe?" He quickly placed his free hand to the boy's forehead to check for a returning fever, and was relieved to find the skin remained cool to the touch. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Felipe looked into Diego's deep blue eyes and shook his head in disbelief. "I saw them." He signed. His hands fumbled for the right words.

"Saw who?"

"My parents." Felipe looked at the white dove that had dropped into his lap. "I saw my parents." He signed again.

"You had a memory?"

Felipe hesitated. He did not want to hurt Diego with talk of his parents. The tears streamed from his dark eyes.

"Felipe." Diego lifted the boy's chin. "You had a memory of your parents, didn't you?"

Felipe nodded.

Diego smiled brightly and pulled Felipe into his arms. He knew how desperate Felipe had been to have memories of his life with his parents. "That is wonderful!" He squeezed tightly. "This is a Christmas filled with miracles."

"Be happy, my sweet child." Felipe heard the angel's voice in his head. "Use your heart to love, not to mourn, and live a life that will make your parents and the de la Vegas proud. Remember, your life is a gift."

Felipe nodded. And then a sudden thought popped into his head. He jumped to his feet.

"Felipe, what is it?"

"Wait! Wait!" Was all that Felipe had time to sign before he sprinted out of the room.

All eyes watched as the boy disappeared. Diego started to follow, but Don Alejandro took his arm. "He'll be back."

Diego nodded.

A few moments later, Felipe returned. His smile was a wide as his face, and his chocolate eyes sparkled with delight. In his arms, he held several wrapped packages that he placed under the tree. Not the usual time for opening presents, Felipe looked to Don Alejandro, as patriarch, for permission.

Don Alejandro smiled and nodded. It was good to see the teen excited about Christmas.

Felipe took the first gift to Mendoza.

"For me?" The Sergeant looked to Diego for confirmation.

Diego could merely shrug. He was as surprised as everyone else. "He wants you to open it, Sgt." Diego translated Felipe's signs.

"Thank you, Felipe. But how did you know I would be here?"

Felipe thought for a moment and shrugged. He just knew.

Mendoza smiled, broadly, and ripped off the colored paper. Inside the wrappings, there was a burlap bag. "Beans!" He exclaimed as he opened the bag. "My favorite!" He then noticed a small wooden ornament that was tied to the bag. It was a small wooden soldier, the same gift that the Sergeant had received in the orphanage, so many years ago. Just as the previous version, the tiny toy was dressed in the uniform of a Sergeant in the Royal Lancers. Only this time, the soldier sported a full dark mustache. Sgt. Mendoza had to pull out his hanky and wipe his runny nose. "Thank you." He grabbed the boy around the shoulders and shook. Felipe's head wobbled back and forth at the force of the Sergeant's embrace.

When Mendoza finally released him, Felipe took a package to Don Alejandro.

Don Alejandro smiled warmly at the boy and took the package. "You have been busier than anyone of us imagined."

Felipe nodded.

Don Alejandro pulled the paper off from around the gift. What he held was a beautifully carved frame. Inside the frame was the portrait that had been kept inside a special cabinet. It was the portrait of his brother, Alfonso de la Vega, who he had died in the battle of Guernavarca. "Magnificent." His voice cracked. "You do fine work." He slapped the boy on the back. "Fine work."

Felipe turned his attention to Victoria. He blushed, again, as the beautiful senorita took the gift from his hands.

"Felipe, what did you do?" Victoria gave him an admonishing smile. Diego couldn't help but notice an almost knowing glance between the two.

Felipe smiled and urged Victoria to open the gift.

"Oh Felipe." She unwrapped a beautiful wooden box. Shined and polished, the lacquered wood shimmered in her hands. On the lid was a beautifully carved long stemmed rose. "Did you carve this?" Victoria's voice was small and filled with emotion as she fingered the carving, a symbol of love often left by Zorro to the doe eyed woman that he loved.

Felipe nodded.

Victoria opened the lid and let out a small gasp. Inside, Felipe had lined the keepsake box with a beautiful black satin—the same black satin used in Zorro's attire. "It is beautiful." She finally managed and placed a kiss of thanks on the teen's cheek. Felipe turned an even deeper crimson.

Diego watched the exchange between the woman that he loved and the teen that he considered a son, and was overcome with emotion.

Felipe hesitated as he knelt by the tree. He picked up another gift, took a deep breath, and stood in front of Diego.

"Felipe, you shouldn't have." Diego took the gift from the boy.

Felipe watched, nervously while Diego unwrapped his gift.

He, too, had been given a beautiful wooden box. Somewhat smaller than Victoria's, the lid was adorned with a simple, yet elegant, **D**. "It is exquisite." He smiled at Felipe, who urged him to continue.

Diego's mouth fell open in shock. Carefully, he lifted an ornate silver pocket watch out of the box. "How?" Diego looked at the boy. "This is very expensive."

Victoria stepped forward and placed a hand on Felipe's back. "He has been working around the Pueblo doing odd jobs for the past several months." She rubbed a comforting circle with her fingertips. "I have never seen anyone work so hard."

"That is where you have been disappearing?" Diego started to understand.

Felipe nodded.

Another realization hit him as well. "Felipe. The hours at the hacienda and …" He didn't say it, but he thought of all that Felipe did in the cave for Zorro. "…and then the pueblo." He shook his head. "No wonder you were sick."

Felipe signed again.

"Open it?"

Felipe nodded. He held his breath, nervous at the reaction that Diego might have.

Diego opened the watch. Inside the lid were the words: _**You gave me a home when I had none. Love when I thought I was lost. I will love you forever. Felipe **_They were some of same words that Felipe had given to Diego in a letter, when he thought that he was leaving the pueblo for good.

Felipe watched as Diego slowly closed the watch and closed his eyes for a moment, unable to speak.

"You don't like it?" Felipe looked worried; his hands trembled while he signed. He tugged on Diego's sleeve. "I can get you something else. I am sorry." He apologized.

"What?" Diego could see the concern on the young man's face. "Felipe, no." He pulled out a hanky and dabbed at his wet eyes. "It is perfect. I love it." He smiled.

Felipe looked suspiciously. "Then what?"

"It is just that it is so much more than I deserve." Diego choked. "I've already been given the greatest gift that I could have been given." He lovingly held the watch. "This is just too much."

"What gift?" Felipe asked.

"Don't you know?"

Felipe shook his head.

"You came back to me." Diego wiped the tears from his eyes. "You…" He tousled the boy's hair. "You were my greatest gift this year." He smiled. "And you have been from the very first day that you came into our lives." He pulled Felipe into his arms.

"This calls for a toast." Don Alejandro announced and the others agreed.

When everyone had a crystal goblet filled with wine, the tiny group faced each other.

"Here is to a sumptuous feast and the wonderful gifts that Felipe provided." Sgt. Mendoza lifted his glass.

"Here is to the laughter and love of friends and family as we gather together." Victoria raised her glass as well.

"To the dedication and sacrifice that each of you gave in bringing Felipe home, making my family whole again, and making this Christmas so special." Don Alejandro tipped his glass to each person in the room.

"Here is to the miracles that have been bestowed upon us this holiday." Diego kept an arm around Felipe. "To the memories of old and the new ones that we make. May we all continue to be blessed with health and happiness throughout the year and may we never forget what is really important."

Felipe smiled up at Diego and signed.

Diego beamed at Felipe with pride as everyone waited for him to interpret.

"May we never forget, It is truly a wonderful life."


End file.
